There’s Never Been A More Insufferable Commercial Than Baker And Saquon

I was going to write this entire blog about Baker Mayfield and Saquon Barkley and how they made the worst commercial of all-time for Hulu. Well, maybe it’s unfair to call this the worst of all time. I guess it’s not that. But I did have to watch it no less than 45 times yesterday as I streamed the NFL on Sunday Ticket (not to brag), and by the 22nd time I saw the zoom in on Saquon’s skinny legs, I was ready to throw my remote through the TV. By time 40, I was ready to pour hot sauce into my eyeballs just so I didn’t have to watch any more. And then the 45th time happened, and I knew I had to jot down some thoughts. Here’s the commercial if you haven’t seen it.

It’s truly just not funny at all. I’m a huge fan of the “Hulu has live sports” genre of commercial. I like that they’re self aware. This one went too far for me. Maybe it’s just that I don’t want a constant reminder of COVID and why they “couldn’t film together” even though they clearly were or just that I saw it too many times. But either way, I think Hulu told their creative marketing department to “make something the olds will share on Facebook” which worked I guess.

But, like I said, I was going to spend this whole blog talking about commercial intricacies and how this one misses the mark, but then I made my way down the YouTube comment rabbit hole, and, buddy, let me tell you something. The YouTube comments section is a weird place. To be fair, basically any comment section is a weird place, just ask Barstool’s PFT, but there’s something special about YouTube. It’s just a bunch of people that aren’t funny or unfunny that either just write down quotes from the video they just watched or write a comment that will slip off into the void 30 seconds later. Take this one for example.

I can’t really tell if Camaro 1968 is trying to be funny or if they’re making a legitimate point. It’s the kind of comment that an eight-year-old kid would make at the playground and then their friend would say “burn” after and the other kid would be like “your body doesn’t work.” But I don’t think Camaro 1968 is a little kid. I think they’re a grown person that still doesn’t know how to make a sick online own like “If Baker actually had that body he could have slipped right under the grasp of the police.”

Another type of commenter is the “well, actually” person who is an abysmal waste of space in real life but a magnificent stallion to watch on the internet. Look at Mr. Tigs for example.

Mr. Tigs just dropped a hard well actually on Hulu. You say you have live sports, but I couldn’t even watch the Bengals and Browns play, Hulu! And what about the fact that you’re giving me one to two options per time slot on Sunday like every other person in America gets!! (Just to be clear, not me because, again, I have Sunday Ticket.) He should have just said, “Well, actually Hulu, you only have some live sports. Market better!”

I kind of like Mr. Tigs. He’s just mad he’s going to miss Dolphins/Jags this week, and I can’t blame him. I get it. Mr. Tigs is harmless, and I’m okay with that. But don’t mess around with the “well, actually” person that’s also mixed with the “I get stuff done” person.

For most people, saying the term deepfake would be like saying Kleenex to mean off-brand CVS tissues. It’d just be accepted at this point. Not for Rowisa Beast though. Rowisa is coming for that ass, Hulu, so watch out.

You thought you could just add the term deepfake to your YouTube title? Not so fast, pal. It seems to me like you’ve forgotten all about the Creative Commons License, and Rowisa is not going to stop until she gets to the bottom of this. She’s asked Hulu to make a note of this but nothing has been changed. You think that’s where it ends? Not a chance. She’s going to be writing emails and letters to John Hulu (I assume that’s the guy’s name who invented it?) asking for demanding some accountability for this gross breach of the CCL.

I’ve shown you all some people that I tend to not care for, but the internet isn’t all bad. Sometimes there are genuinely nice real life and definitely not fake people out there who just want to pay some compliments to their fellow human beings. So, I’ll leave you with Julie Cornwall and her affinity for Ramon and his Fall wreaths and mantle designs. An affinity so deep that she had to post about it on the YouTube video of this dumb Saquon and Baker commercial.

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